Male Domestic Abuse

Domestic abuse is a widespread issue that affects individuals of all genders and ages. It can be physical, emotional, or psychological, and can occur in various types of relationships, including those between intimate partners, family members, and roommates. However, despite the increasing awareness of domestic violence against women, male domestic abuse is often overlooked and not discussed as frequently. In this article, we will explore why men do not talk about male domestic abuse and the impact it has on their lives.

Male Domestic Abuse: An Overview

Male domestic abuse occurs when a man experiences abuse or violence from his partner, ex-partner, family member, or someone else with whom he has a close relationship. The abuse can take various forms, including physical violence, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, financial abuse, and controlling behaviour.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) in America, approximately one in four men experience physical violence, rape, or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime. However, men are less likely to report the abuse or seek help due to various reasons.

Why Men Do Not Talk About Male Domestic Abuse

  1. Shame and Stigma

One of the primary reasons why men do not talk about male domestic abuse is the shame and stigma associated with being a male victim. In many societies, men are expected to be strong and dominant, and admitting to being a victim of abuse can be seen as a sign of weakness or emasculation. This can make men feel ashamed and isolated, and they may fear being judged or ridiculed if they speak out.

  1. Fear of Retaliation

Another reason why men do not talk about male domestic abuse is the fear of retaliation from their abusers. Men may worry that their abusers will escalate the violence if they report it or try to leave, or they may fear losing access to their children or property. This fear can make it challenging for men to seek help or escape from the abusive situation.

  1. Lack of Awareness

Many men may not even realize they are experiencing abuse. Domestic abuse against men is not as well-publicized as it is against women, and many men may not recognize the signs of abuse or understand that it is not their fault. This lack of awareness can make it challenging for men to recognize that they need help or support.

  1. Lack of Resources

Even if men do recognize that they are experiencing abuse, they may face barriers to accessing support and resources. Domestic violence shelters and support services are often geared towards women, and men may not know where to turn for help. Additionally, many men may not have the financial resources to leave an abusive relationship, as they may be the primary breadwinners or have limited access to joint resources.

The Impact of Male Domestic Abuse

The impact of male domestic abuse can be significant and long-lasting. Men who experience abuse may suffer from physical injuries, mental health issues, and social isolation. They may also struggle with feelings of shame, guilt, and low self-esteem, which can make it challenging to form healthy relationships in the future.

In addition to the personal impact, male domestic abuse can also have broader societal consequences. It perpetuates gender stereotypes and reinforces the idea that men cannot be victims, which can make it harder for male victims to come forward and seek help. It can also perpetuate the cycle of violence, as men who experience abuse are more likely to perpetrate violence against others in the future.


Male domestic abuse is a significant issue that affects millions of men around the world. However, the stigma and shame associated with being a male victim can make it challenging for men to come forward and seek help. It is essential to raise awareness about male domestic abuse and to provide support and resources that are inclusive of all genders. By breaking down the barriers that prevent men from speaking out, we can start to raise awareness and provide support to the same level as women get for domestic abuse.